"It's dark...definitely there's some darkness, though I wouldn't say it's completely dark in there. It's more low-lit, shall we say. And terrifying."
Prayer groups have begun to organize an impromptu candlelight vigil outside Ben's home, and the local Perkins is offering a new breakfast special - the Rind Bender - to coax their favorite customer out of his unrestful slumber with this citrus-heavy crepe dusted with both powdered and brown sugar.
Wake up Ben, you're having a bad dream.
FALSE: Ben is currently ONLINE on xbox live, watching Bela Fleck: Throw Down Your Heart on Netflix Instant watch.
ReplyDeleteHowever he is unresponsive to messages.
Save your yellow journalism for the funny papers, Lee. He probably fell asleep to an instant-view Netflix movie. Maybe a horror movie? Turistas 2: Madison Vacation?
ReplyDeleteBela Fleck is giving Ben nightmares.
ReplyDeleteTRUTH: John was on Ben's xbox live, watching Bela Fleck.
ReplyDeleteTRUTH #2: Ben was spotted at indoor frisbee tonight.
You know what's weird? I did not post that article at 7:52pm, it was past 10pm. What bizarro time zone does this blog run on? Why doesn't it run on Ben's timezone?
ReplyDeleteGripe #2: That survey on "when you usually think about Ben" has had three days left to vote...for two days now (at least). Apparently Ben has some funky effect on the time-space continuum.
ReplyDeleteI think the post time is an personal setting, J. For me it says you posted at 9:52pm.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I'm willing to entertain the possibility that there's some kind of Space-Ben continuum in which time doesn't pass through linearly and thus is screwing up all the message post times.
Shut up, dudes. The blog time is set to Ben Time, known to some as Central Standard Time. There will be no more complaints.
ReplyDeleteOh reaaaaaaally?
ReplyDeleteNo you shut up.
ReplyDelete